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Old 06-11-2011, 08:25 PM   #1
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Location: Weare N.H.
Posts: 10,499

Dear Noah,

We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.



Dear Twilight fans,

Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection.

Enjoy fantasizing about that.



Dear Icebergs,

Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's a *****.


The Titanic

Dear America,

You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.



Dear Yahoo,

I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...



Dear girls who have been dumped,

There are plenty of fish in the sea... Just kidding! They're all dead.



Dear Saturn,

I liked it, so I put a ring on it.



Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,

Please lknvfdmv.xvn.

Sincerely, Stevie Wonder

Dear Nickleback,

That's enough.

Sincerely, The World

Dear Scissors,

I feel your pain.....no one wants to run with me either.

Sincerely, Sarah Palin

Dear Osama Bin Laden,


Sincerely, United States

Dear World of Warcraft,

Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.

Sincerely, Parents Everywhere

Dear Customers,

Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.

Sincerely, Nail Salon Ladies

Dear Global Warming,

You're the best imaginary friend ever!

Sincerely, Al Gore

Dear Ugly People,

You're welcome.

Sincerely, Alcohol

Dear World,

Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars ends there because some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?


The Mayans

Dear White People,

Don't you just hate immigrants?


Native Americans

Dear iPhone,

Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut.


Every iPhone User

Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,

Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die. CRAP! Where did you go?



Dear Trash,

At least you get picked up...


The Girls of Jersey Shore

Dear Man,

It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?


-Mitch K

'91 Z70 Bravada lowered 4" 350 Vortec w/TBI, TCI-700r4, KYB's, 9C1 cop car steering gear, rear sway bar, yada yada...
'05 Subaru Legacy wagon (wife's daily)
'04 Subaru Forester XT EJ255 turbo, TBE, lowered 1.5" w/springs
'02 K2500HD single cab 6.0 4L80E 8' plow sander/spreader
Case 580K 4x4 w/chains, 10' power angle plow

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"The spirit of resistance to government
is so valuable on certain occasions,
that I wish it to be always kept alive.
It will often be exercised when wrong,
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Old 06-11-2011, 08:43 PM   #2
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Not bad.. i chuckled a few times
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:16 PM   #3
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Location: Very top of Illinois
Posts: 11,164
Dear Nickleback,

That's enough.

Sincerely, The World
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Old 06-12-2011, 11:38 AM   #4
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Posts: 10,134
lots of good ones! Thanks.
S-nats... '04, '05, '06, '07, '08, '09

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Old 06-12-2011, 09:54 PM   #5
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Nice ones. Got my mind off some junk. Thanks.
1985 S10 - 1995 LT1 & 4L60E
1964 Chevy II - 1999 LS1 & T56
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Old 06-26-2011, 07:38 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by HectorM52 View Post
Nice ones. Got my mind off some junk. Thanks.
X2. No "me" time or money for the next 5 years. Fun to even chuckle.
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